There was a time before when my blog contained most of my musings, thoughts and feelings. That was more than 12 years ago in Tabulas where I met 2 of my closest online friends including Roselle of Snapped and Scribbled.
When I decided to have this blog I thought of creating something that's more positive and I avoided personal topics but having read some of Maine Mendoza's blog kind of reminded me of my previous Tabulas blog where I blurt out what I feel and think without thinking what other people might think of me. She is an eloquent and expressive writer... I became curious of her since I watch Aldub videos every night to make me laugh and make this pregnancy fun and light--- have to be happy and not stressed according to friends :)
So, going back, I am going to put more personal thoughts in this blog like I did before.
THE ACTUAL ENTRY:
Reading about blogs on love gone wrong and the feeling of helplessness and "dying" because your dreams of forever with that person has died kind of reminded me when I had my first broken heart. I wasn't that young already since I was in my 20's but it hurt a lot. Even if my claim on that relationship is 4-6 mos. only. Hahaha!
I was crazy in the aftermath and had a fleeting of "I will wait you for you" drama even if I knew that I was dumped and it wasn't even a good relationship to begin with and with someone who barely shows who he is. I guess, I was tortured by my emotional investment. I prayed to God that I hope one day he bangs his head and realizes his mistake of letting me go.
There was even a point that I posted the video of Sarah Geronimo's "I still believe in loving you" and a friend cringed and commented "For heaven's sake, don't!". I felt embarrassed by the comment but it was a wake up call to STOP holding on to my one sided and blind feelings.
So I went on with my life and made sure I had some adventures and take risks in my career, in my masters and other aspects of my life. My prayers changed and I was asking God that if ever He will give me someone new to love I hope he would love me back in return. But I was not really that keen into having a new relationship. I was so focused on my career.
But God, has heard my prayers..so after 3 years, I met my bestfriend, my sweetheart, my husband and my lover. It was good He did not answer my prayers on getting back with the first one I prayed for but He did answer my petition on a new love. I got so much more than what I asked for,
2 years ago my husband introduced me to Gath Brook's song - Unanswered Prayers and it all sums up how I felt with him... until now that we're about to celebrate our 5th wedding anniversary about a week from now. =)
So for those who are dying from broken hearts .. just wait... magdasal, enjoy life, accomplish more in life and darating din sya..... sa tamang panahon ;)